Welfare to work

I was in favor of Welfare to Work long before the governmental programs were instituted. It is a no-brainer for me after mothering a houseful of children. Each child began life on the family dole and thought they were set for the rest of their lives. It was my job to slowly disillusion them. “No free lunch around darling. You’re either in school or at work!”
The first to come full face up against my Welfare to Work plan was a
high schooler. He came to me early one school day, “What if I don’t want to go to school?”
“Then you will have to pay rent.”
“What if I don’t have the money to pay rent?”
“Then you will have to get a job to pay rent.”
He quit asking “what ifs”, dressed quickly, went to school and stayed for graduation. The necessity of getting a job is a great impetus.
That’s what I like about the Welfare to Work program – the necessity.
My plans as a mother did not include having unemployed adult/children returning home to live. I assumed they would be out and working.
However one son, after a hospitalization, asked to recuperate at home. I reluctantly agreed.
When he arrived I announced, “You will have to pay room and board.” I named an price below apartment rental.
Once the shock wore off, he asked, “Do I have time to recuperate and look for a job?” I felt like a Grinch so I added a touch of compassion,
“Okay, a month or so.” Two months later he was earning enough for rent, gas and car insurance and had a few coins to jingle in his pocket.
Plus, he fixes supper a time or two each week, does his own laundry and his share of house and yard work. I can live with that.
My Welfare to Work philosophy began as a child in religious education memorizing Bible verses, including II Thessalonians 3:10 “if a man does not work, neither will he eat.” That sentence has permeated much of my adult life and thoughts. Because my husband agrees, it is easier to insist our children work and pay their own way.
But it isn’t always easy to get to that agreement. Friends of ours did everything they could physically, emotionally, socially and financially to help their adult/child make the transition to independent living.
They stretched all their resources for one who wanted the expensive trappings of an adult, without doing everything it took to get them.
Finally, they simply gave up and, along with the rest of the family, said, “No more help. It is time to sink or swim.” Then they held their breath, waited and watched.
The adult/child began swimming. When she could breathe again, the mother told me, “once I made up my mind to draw that line, it was so easy to do.”
When Welfare to Work was passed, some non-profits that work with the unemployed to assist with legitimate financial needs held their breath, anticipating they would drown with requests for help. However the line was drawn during a period of years of low unemployment. People found jobs and began swimming.
It is absolutely amazing how big a difference a little forced necessity can make.