National goof-off day

After December’s rush towards Christmas, January’s New Year parties and a season of family birthdays … after the stress of ensuring a romantic Feb. 14 and slipping by the Ides of March, I welcome March 22: National Goof Off Day. It comes just in time to recuperate from the six long weeks of winter which inevitably follow Ground Hog’s day. Finally, this week we get a day that screams for us to DO ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
Now thanks to the Goof Off Wipes Company, I can legitimately, officially, simply enjoy being who I am, where I am and tell everyone who wants me to do something, “I’m sorry. Today is National Goof Off Day. And I am an avid celebrant of this one day in the year. Today, I’m not doing anything for anyone. ”
Unlike some people who take every opportunity they can to goof-off at work, at home or around town, I figure I earned a “Goof-off Day.” Saturday I will maintain a self-righteous attitude of “Today, I am doing exactly what is expected of me: I am goofing off. ”
My favorite memories focus on my few and far-between goof-off days.
It was about this time of year way back when we lived in Indiana that I had another memorable Goof-Off day. I stayed in bed with my favorite book. My husband had something he worked on quietly, the kids played or read their own books around me. We enjoyed being, without some expectation of having achieved a thing the entire day.
Obviously my favorite kind of goof-off day is one spent with a book in hand. Other folks have other dream goof-off days. Goof-off days restore and rejuvenate between one hectic rush and another. One summer before a planned two-week car trip, I packed clothes, prepared snacks and stored up goof-off time by reading eight novels in one week.
The best Goof-Off Day was a rainy non-school day for me, but a work day for my mom. My father, the farmer, went to see a man about a big, black dog. (His expression for going off to take care of business.)
Such a luxury that goof-off day afforded me. My parents always had plenty to keep their five children busy: I washed dishes, swept the floor, ironed clothes, threw hay down to the cows and in general, pitched in and did my part. When my parents were around, I stayed busy and finished my chores on time before I went outside to play.
Now it is time to tell the rest of the story. On that rainy day, with no adults around, I took my mother’s fuzzy house coat, fixed myself a raspberry swirl ice cream cone, tucked my book under my arm and went out to the rickety, paint-free weathered shed sheltering the antique hay rake, perched on the seat and read my book. The rain falling on the tin roof lulled me into the book’s never-never land where everything turned out happily ever after.
That day lives in memory as the best of all days.
This week I am preparing to enjoy National Goof-Off Day to the fullest. Believe me after I do my spring cleaning, wash the car, and finish up a couple of crafts, I will be good and ready for Saturday’s National Goof-off day. But don’t bother to call and expect me to celebrate this national day with you … I’ll be too busy doing absolutely nothing – except reading a good book.
(Joan Hershberger is a reporter at the News-Times.)