New Year’s resolutions … of a sort

It is a new year and I have resolved this year to blow it all off and live a little. This year I am going to enjoy myself.

Instead of mentally weighing and measuring calories and nutrition and resolving to lose weight – this year I resolve to eat candy bars, hamburgers, deep fried fish, French fries, large shakes, macaroni and cheese and lots and lots of cookies – and for sure a rich, rich chocolate cake or two, or three.
This year, I resolve to toss caution to the wind, quit trying to save up for my retirement – who know if I will live long enough to enjoy it anyway? This year, I am going to dip into my savings and enter the malls with credit card in hand and the clarion call on my lips, “Charge!” This year, I am going to get a completely new wardrobe from head to toe and not look for a sales price – not even once. This year I will just buy whatever makes me look fantastic and not worry about the cost.

This year, the water company and the electric company can just hold their horses on those payments. For 25 years, I’ve faithfully paid my bills – they owe me a month or two of freedom from the constraints of ritually paying them first while I pinch my pennies to see if I have any money left over for “me-time.”

This year, I resolve to use up all my sick days at work, even if the only reason for calling-in sick is that I am sick and tired of getting up so early to put in my 40 hours a week.

This year, I resolve to quit biting my tongue. This year I will quit exercising control and holding back everything I am thinking. This year, I will enjoy complete freedom of expression and not be so inhibited.

This year I resolve to go to the gym only when I really feel like it. I will not push myself when my bones ache, when a good show is on television or the burgers are two for one.

This year, I resolve to enjoy the luxury of self-pity when things do not go my way or when I don’t want to listen to one more word of common sense.
This year I will enjoy a good sulk in a corner when I don’t get my way.

This year – for once in my life – I am going to be the one throwing a temper tantrum when life hits a rough spot and I don’t get my way. After years of raising kids and dealing with their temper tantrums, it’s my turn to pitch a fit.

This year, I am going to give myself permission to take a break from church, worship, prayer and tithing. I’ve faithfully done all those things for years. God mandated the seventh day of rest from work, surely he agrees with a rest from serving and worshiping Him with other believers.

So I resolve to take a break until I need the fellowship or until the folks at the church have a really good program, preacher, worship service or Sunday School class that really intrigues me, then, and only then, will I go.

This year I will quit hogging all the time and attention in the children’s department and let someone else lead the classes, prepare the lessons and control the kiddies.

This year, I resolve to do what is right in my own eyes and never look around to see how it affects others.
This year, I will toss it all to the wind like feathers from a pillow – with the hope that next year when I turn around to gather up it all up again that I will find each and every feather of frivolity and put them all back into place.

But that’s next year. This is now and I will enjoy playing with the wind and refuse to watch where the feathers fly.


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