Family Foodies

Family get-togethers can be interesting. We gather from central Michigan to southern Arkansas, from Missouri to Pennsylvania. They come from heavily populated industrial areas and little communities in the big forest. We gather with diverse differences, especially in the kitchen. Beforehand a joint text went out asking who wants to be in charge of which meals. I already knew that we had a vegetarian teenager who avoids all animal flesh. Before accepting a proffered cookie the teen asked, “Did you make it with lard?” What! Me make cookies with lard? Never! I come from a Crisco family and have slowly converted to butter. Well that’s what I thought while answering with a puzzled look, “No. No lard.” It took me a while to realize the question came from a deeply rooted vegetarian decision that excludes lard from rendered animal fat. Okay, I am safe there. So no-meat teen meets mostly-meat Aunt and Uncle. Their decision came last year after decades of Uncle eating huge bowls of ice cream every night. Husband and wife lost 45 and 78 pounds respectively. They feel better, so their commitment stands firm. They prepared all the breakfasts and told us not to worry about other meals, “We will work out our own food,” They showed up with Greek yogurt and cottage cheese. For meals they pile up the meat, sour cream, cheese, and a few vegetables. The teen heaps up the veggies and cheese and skips all meat. Besides entertaining those extremes, we have one who eats everything except pork. No bacon, sausage or hot dogs made with pork and no ham sandwiches. Everyone else ate bacon, sausage and eggs for breakfast. He ate eggs.During the holidays, I expect loads of cookies, cakes, pies and candy. Sweets! I like my sweets. I have caught myself eating five and six servings a day until I regretfully, quietly swore off the sugars, while still making all of the above. For our Christmas family visit I gathered up the holiday sweets most of which included some chocolate. Everyone loves chocolate candy, cake and cookies. Everyone that is except the eight year old grandson who announced. “I don’t like chocolate.” “He doesn’t. He won’t eat it,” his grandmother said. We all looked at this anomaly: a child whose face will never be smeared with chocolate ice cream? Really? Really. Unknowingly I accommodated him. I brought a recent estate sale find: a heavy-duty ice shaver to make snow cones plus bottles of flavored syrups. I did not plan to have any, but I know kids like them. I demonstrated the machine: Load a cup of ice cubes, drop the pusher, turn on the machine and press down on the pusher. A few seconds later they scoop up a mound of ice shavings, add flavor and walk away with a grin on their face. The “I hate chocolate” kid grinned a lot. When no one was looking, one after another, he prepared and consumed four servings of sweetened ice one day. His mother commented, “He does not get that many sweets at home.” She was not there to stop him. In spite of our dietary differences, we made it through the visit. The meat lovers helped clear out any meat leftovers. The vegetarian cleared out the veggies. The kids cleared up the sweets. After a couple of days I discovered a heap of forgotten oranges, apples and mangoes. I began slicing and leaving out trays of fruits. The fruit slowly disappeared. Evidently eaten by anyone other than those who abstain from fresh fruit. I left further convinced that while we provide the place to stay, I will stand back and let the families figure out the meals so that I don’t have to worry about whether I forget one of those diverse personal choices and offend someone.