family heritage

I was up early the Thursday morning before our last child’s wedding ceremony, praying for the couple, those traveling, those coming (or unable to come) to the wedding and reflecting over our ever increasing family. As I waited, I realized the truth of a verse we read at our own wedding 31 years ago: Psalms 127:3 “Children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb is His reward.”
Each of our children and grandchildren enriches our lives with his or her unique personality and interest. My husband and I have gained from both our good and the bad experiences with each one of them. Each child has taught and enriched our lives from birth to wedding.
Take their tastes in food: Early in our marriage my step-son’s love of peanut-butter on pancakes challenged my food tolerance levels. I thought it was absolutely disgusting. Every time I made pancakes, I argued against putting peanut butter on the table. He stubbornly kept asking for his favorite topping.
I was adamant – until I realized I was sweating the small stuff. It may not have been the way my mom served pancakes, but peanut butter provided a perfectly good, healthy nutrition topping to pancakes and other foods. I relented and bought a huge jar of the peanut butter, designated it solely his and told him to eat it anyway he wanted. I learned. Last year I caught myself spreading peanut butter on pancakes to feed the youngest grandchildren, and didn’t even blink. This year I am learning to enjoy the rich flavors of Indonesian yellow rice with chicken – without insisting that my way of preparing chicken and rice is the only way to go.
Our differences are emphasized every time we stop at a book store. Inside the store, each family member heads for a different section of the store: carpentry hints and projects, self-help, computer, novels, recipe books, crafts, sports, cars, children’s books and religion. I share my favorite reads from the self-help section as well as, my favorite, well-written children’s books.
One of my favorite children’s picture books, “The Country Bunny and the Little Gold Shoes” by Duose Heyward and illustrated by Marjorie Flack, reflects the variety gained from having many children: The country bunny groups her many children into pairs to sweep floors, wash dishes, make beds, cook meals, wash and mend clothes, paint pictures for the house or sing to entertain the rest while they worked. As they worked each duet developed expertise in their assigned area.
It took a few years, but now my husband has home-grown experts with whom he can discuss carpentry, computers and cameras – and a son-in-law who shares his avid interest in sports and cars.
This summer’s wedding underscored our diversity. The bride wore a traditional, Indonesian wrapped skirt and shawl. Guests brought American and Indonesian food. In fact, the past few years, we have been rich with a variety of weddings: a package deal at a wedding house, family and friends working to make the day special for the next couple and a simple ceremony with the justice of the peace followed by a cake and punch at the house for yet another.
Even grandchildren with the same parents have further enriched our lives: volleyball, band, avid reading, bug collections and trains. The grandson at two wanted his grandfather’s hammer and a few nails. At three his sister wanted dress up clothes and tea parties.
Tea parties or hammers, big people or little, rice or peanut butter, good times and bad, we have truly been blessed by family and their varied interests and abilities.