“We always knew the grocery store’s special of the week. When chicken was on sale, we received a lot of chicken casseroles,” observed the bemused mother of a young family following her lengthy recuperation from an accident. She was not complaining – with weeks of rehabilitation she welcomed everything anyone did to help her family through that difficult time.
Until a family crisis disrupted our quiet, empty nest, I did not understand how much she appreciated the help. My husband and I threw a few clothes into carry-on bags and flew away to assist as needed and keep tabs on the crisis. By default, I took on kitchen duty and some supervision of the children.
Standing there in an unfamiliar kitchen, with a confusing array of roads to unfamiliar shops and markets, I felt unsure where to begin a meal. Then, a woman from the church called to ask what we needed, could use and how much storage space we had available in the freezer.
The next day a Thanksgiving dinner arrived: a gallon of gravy, a tub of mashed potatoes, a tray of sweet potatoes, one huge turkey, a heaping bowl of corn, trays of rolls and cranberry sauce. The kids loved it. Of course, there was no way we could eat it all one sitting but the leftovers staved off hunger and kept us occupied developing a variety of dishes for subsequent meals. The two rotisserie chickens that came a couple days later and left-over turkey, gravy and vegetables made a couple fantastic chicken pot pies that everyone scarfed down and chicken salad for sandwiches.
As I made my way through the collage of foods that followed, I developed a keen awareness of the blessing of helps provided through this ministry. Some of the women I never saw. They left a frozen casserole at the church or sent one along with another delivery.
The meal coordinators even called and visited to gather information on what help and foods the family needed and passed the information along to others. When a grandchild answered the phone and then asked me, “do we still need peanut butter?” I thought it was a family member in the grocery store, “Yes,” I said thinking of peanut butter and jam, one of my comfort foods and a quick sandwich for kids to make and carry to activities.
Besides being free from most shopping, I also did not have to deal with stacks of dirty cooking dishes, pots and pans. I could focus on the crisis and keep the children on task with their school work or sit down at the computer and update concerned folks with the latest news. The grandkids also amazed me with their willingness to pitch in, take care of their own clothes, their own dishes, help with younger siblings and clean up their own messes. When we worked together, I did not need to coach them through the process of making cookies, washing dishes or re-arranging the refrigerator for the turkey leftovers. They knew what to do and jumped right into doing it. But, the prepared meals also gave them time to make “get well” cards, focus on their daily routines and still have time to play.
I am quite capable working in a kitchen, but in the midst of a crisis, I realized the relief of being able to focus on the crisis and the family. For all the folks who ever prepared meals for others through the years, if no one ever said, “thank you,” take this as your personal note. Your contribution is and was greatly appreciated.
(Joan Hershberger is a reporter at the News-Times. E-mail her at joanh@everybody.org.)